Hooch, I got to thinking about how you don't know how to sew yet. It has kept me up the past two nights. Maybe your not really a gear guy at all. maybe you are an imposter hammocker. Then I did some checking into your background. I had some of my friends down at the FBI run your profile.
You have an uncanny likeness to D.B. Cooper, the infamous hijacker From the 70s that parachuted over Washington State. Turn yourself in before we do or at least split the money. $200,000 could buy alot of rip-stop.