Sorry you're having such a hard time. It is worth it in the long run though if you get it figured out.
Have you ever considered making a bit longer hammock? I've found that (for me) longer hammocks are a little more comfortable, due to perhaps laying a bit flatter on the diagonal, (now that I think about it, I'd be hard pressed to explain why it is more comfy).
I start at about 10' long, and by the time I whip it it's a little bit shorter than that. You can always start long (or longer) and get shorter as you determine what works better for you. Just a suggestion, YMMV.
"Civilization is the limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities." - Mark Twain
“I go to nature to be soothed and healed, and to have my senses put in order.” - John Burroughs