Hammock Hate

[fin]

Let me start off...Hammocks are terrible if you are drunk. When your world is spinning, the last thing you need, is to lay in a hammock that does not stop swaying....lesson learned.

seconded with the 'drunk in a hammock', that was a very bad night :/

I don't know, puking over the side of a hammock is better than puking on the floor of a tent.

It's impossible to cowboy camp with a hammock, but I get to look up at stars every night that isn't raining because I don't pitch my tarp unless the threat of rain or heavy condensation exists. And the social aspect is WHY I went to a hammock. I can roll into my hammock far away from all my snoring buddies when the campfire dies down.

The only downside is sleeping duo in hammocks. There just isn't a good alternative with a hammock. Mind you, I don't mind being jammed up tight against some lovely lady in my hammock, but not all night. It is just too warm.

Seriously, there is no perfect sleeping situation in the woods. Everything has a drawback of some sort, hammocks included. But I will take a hammock every day over the various alternatives, it is definitely the most comfortable "single" sleep system for me. I even converted 3 people to hammocks on the AT with my system.

[fin]

everyone is a multicolored unicorn who eat rainbows and poop butterflies!

Or is that eat butterflies and poop rainbows? I always get confused on that aspect.

Jim

Rose-colored glasses? Filled with Woodford Reserve Maple Wood Finish?

[BER]

I hate that there are no hammocks available that sleep two people side by side, comfortably without being smushed together, with the ability to share a quilt and cuddle up (this rules out the Clark Veretex IMO), and in a reasonable weight class. When with my lovely bride, we'd rather sleep on the ground in our Copper Spur (granted with comfy Exped downmats and a doublewide sleeping bag), than sleep separately in hammocks side by side.

[lymphocytosis]

I miss the social aspect of the tent, too. My last trip to the BWCA felt lonely just because my buddies would hang out in the tent and I'd read by myself. Oh, and having somewhere to easily change clothes without getting eaten alive by mosquitoes. Changing pants zipped into my blackbird is a challenge.

Other than that, though, I don't miss tenting.

[Riverpirate]

I hate that they are so expensive. Not individually but collectively. A tent is a tent. Once you have one you are set. It is not that way with hammocks. You need a collection so you can chose the right one for the situation at hand. Almost as bad as fly rods. Wel at least that is my explanation to my wife.

[JoelMalone]

I hate that my wife doesn't believe my lie, "I don't enjoy going every weekend. I have to. I can't do product development for Kammok without sufficient product testing. I would rather stay home, but I have no choice...."

[WV]

Like most of you, I enjoy pointing out things I like about hammocks, converting ground dwellers, sharing discoveries with like-minded friends, and learning from others' hammock experiences. However the reason there are so many enthusiastic responses and interesting ideas on this forum is that hammocks, like people, are imperfect, and I think we will benefit even more if we keep that fact in mind.

Ber's response is a great example of what this thread can contribute to HF. It focuses on two flaws, and it manages to do so in fairly general terms. Making meaningful generalizations is a great talent:

1) Hammocks for two are usually unsuccessful, because the weight of the occupants tends to push them together in the center. Attempts to modify hammocks to support two people in relative proximity and comfort have largely failed. Some individual attempts have come closer to solving this problem than others, perhaps.

2) People are flawed; the desire to cuddle with a loved one who is also enjoying the hammock-in-the wilderness experience puts considerable restraints on that experience (because of the hammock, right? It can't be the fault of the people. )

This is the virtue of finding general truths. Specific complaints will blame either hammock #1 or sweetie #2. (Merely raising the question in this form is already causing problems. You have more than one hammock, don't you? )

I believe we need to bite the bullet and get down to specifics, talking about problems with individual hammocks. In the interest of self-preservation I would like to avoid any issues with individual hammockers.

The hammocks I know best are the ones I have built, so I'll start. (Take as given for any piece of equipment under review that it cost me some time and hard-earned money, it has many wonderful features, and I'm still using it - it's "a keeper", hence wonderful.)

Hammock #5, a gathered end model with a modified channel, and a footbox added after manufacture, has a structural ridgeline with prussicked and/or penberthy sliders for bungees that support the underquilt, a bugnet sewn to one side with a weighted pocket on the other side, two side tie-outs on the hammock that line up with attachment loops for the UQ, shock cords in the hammock sides and ends (partially), various tie-out and support lines for hammock and tarp that use Tarp Flyz, LineLocs, or tautline hitches (all with or without bungee self-tensioning loops, plus a main suspension with whoopies with whipping sliders and tree straps using marlin-spike hitches and toggles (or carabiners). Got that? I lent this hammock to a friend who hiked with me last weekend. Rather than have a smart guy stand around and feel useless I taught him how to set up his own rig. It took about an hour. I could have done it myself in 10 minutes. The second night it only took a 30 minute refresher course, but it wasn't raining then. I hate the complexity of my DIY solutions that have evolved through numerous modifications. There are very few simple hammocks.

I'll add another problem hammock in another post (without the explanatory preamble, but remember that any piece of equipment I describe is wonderful).

[bdbart]

(Merely raising the question in this form is already causing problems. You have more than one hammock, don't you? )

You may merely need more than one sweetie

[toober]

I hate the fact that there are no hammock stores. There are mattress stores, futon stores, and bedroom sections in large department stores, but no hammock sections. "Here is the best way to sleep, just don't try to sell them and consumers will never know what they're missing."

[exup]

I love everything about hammocks. About the drunk thing, I have never been to intoxicated in my hammock as I don't drink often anymore (actually usually only on group hangs), but I'd think it would be great, you can do the leg off the bed thing to stop the spins, haha, can't do that in a tent or on the ground.